Sunday, August 5, 2012

What To Expect When You're NOT Expecting

The first thing, if you're a mom of many, is to expect everyone to think you are pregnant.  Many times they will ask and even when you say, "I don't think so", they don't believe you.

Expect to have more energy.  I've been pregnant and/or nursing for so long that's it's nice to feel a little more energetic and feel like I kind of have my body back.

Expect to not be able to eat as much as when you're nursing or pregnant.  This is kind of a bummer, but you have no food restrictions!

Expect to see pregnant women and think, "wow, it would be nice to be pregnant again", of course forgetting all the hard things about pregnancy. (not that it's not SO worth it)

Expect to see the cutest maternity clothes ever, when you're not expecting.  Seriously, you'll think, "I want that!  They never had cute clothes like that when I was pregnant!"

Expect to be able to do lots of things you can't do when pregnant, like ride roller coasters ( I love to do that), run marathons (I don't like to do that), snow ski, water ski, ride a real bike and mountain climb (I did honestly miss those things when expecting : )

Expect to drool over baby clothes in the mall and the newest baby equipment.

Expect, now that you're not expecting, for people to ask more of you.  You know, bake dozens of cookies for some random event, work in the nursery at church, bring meals to just about everyone you know, teach a class, organize the Olympics, etc.

Expect your kids always be asking, "Mom, when will we have another baby?!"

Expect to feel a little sad that you don't have a little one in your tummy miraculously growing and you never know if you will ever again. 


  1. For me, I can't wear any kind of shirt with a tie in the back, because that sends the whole church talking about us having another one.

    But, I totally love going into the hospital and get envious of all my friends on their way in.

    What is better than a craftmatic bed with a remote, a tv mounted on a wall and a little pencil to circle and order food that someone else make for you.
    Bliss, I tell you.

    1. I know! I totally agreed. And most of all, a tiny little one in a bassinet right next to you. And only the baby and yourself to take care of....bliss, bliss :)

  2. I agree with many things on your list! We only have 4, but we've had them every two years until this last one and I find myself having to say, "Not that I know of" to many people who flat out ask or hint. It doesn't bother me as I'm a very curious person too. :) Sometimes I even offer the information just so people don't have to ask. ;) I'm praying for contentment even if 4 is all the Lord has for us. I enjoy reading about your large family!

  3. I actually get a little jealous of pregnant mom's, wishing it was me:)
    What are the ages of your lovely children?

    1. Hi Lisa, my children (at the moment : ) are 21,19,18,14,11,9,7,6,3 and 17 months.

  4. I totaly agree.
    If you have a little belly, people will look at you and you see them think 'Is she pregnant again?'

    I do have a weakness for baby clothes en things.
    My husbands forbits me going to the babyshop.
    'I only want to look, not buy anything?!'

    But being pregnant isn't my hobby.
    I don't like to be 'fat', not wear, or being able to do things I want to do
    I also have pelvic instability, that's no fun.

    I my love kids, every age has his thing.
    We would like to have more kids.
    We'll see, who knows.

    The kids would like more brothers and sisters.

    We don't take 'having children' for granted.

  5. With 8 kids in 12 year, 9 actually, I'm due at the end of the year, I'm always asked if I'm pregnant inbetween babies. Most of the time I don't mind, I like to tell people that (whichever baby I'm pregnant with at the time) is our middle child. heehee Totally freaks them out. The one thing I miss the most is running. After baby 7 I got into running and fell in love with it! I do remember feeling envious of others having babies when I wasn't pregnant. We look forward to seeing how many more blessing we will have. Love the post!

  6. haha! I am in the same boat. I am learning to enjoy life without nursing or being pregnant. Wondering if there will be another one. Loving my dtr in loves pregnancy and expecting Grand-dumpling #2 soon. Each season is a blessing....a gift....and I am learning to enjoy each season the best I can.

  7. Hi Becca
    Your oldest child on your side bar looks totally different with all that hair! I could hardly believe it was the same kid as the family photo on your header. You have a beautiful family!
    Our chidren are 18,17,15,12,11,7 and we are currently trying to adopt our precious foster baby who is 15 months, but we have had him since birth. Some of our kids are the same as yours, except we only have one girl! Starting in Oct. the birthdays begin, so each child is almost another year older.
    Hope you have a great day!

  8. Dear Becca, Thank you! I really appreciate your gift of writing about what we moms-of-many experience. I am 16 years ahead of you--my oldest of eleven is 37, and my youngest is 15--but as I read your posts I'm always nodding my head, smiling, remembering, and thinking, yep that's exactly how it is. I'm going to tell my daughters about your blog, as they are having lots of babies now, and I'm sure it would encourage them to hear you describe these things. It encourages me still. Thank you again.

  9. I love this post! everything is so true and that's what makes it funny.

    We were on our way to having our 10th baby -- 5 separate times,actually - but lost them all in miscarriage. Our youngest (#9) is now 4 years old, and I just turned 43, so I don't know if there will be anymore babies for us. I have been saying that the 40's have not been kind to me, LOL, because every conception since I turned 40 has not made it past the 9 week mark. I never had a miscarriage until I entered my 40's. I miss being pregnant, and I miss the newborn stage and all that. But I will say that it's been nice having my body all to myself. I had forgotten what that is like! I've started running and have worked up to two miles a day :) The thought of having another baby makes me happy, but to be truthful the thought of being pregnant again fills me with a bit of dread, only because I don't want to go through another loss.

  10. I can SO relate to this post. I had a miscarriage in April at 44 and I am so worried/sad/emotional that I don't know if we'll have another baby. I'm always so glad to come here and find someone to relate to :) oxoxo fellow mama to ten


Thanks so much for your comments! I love them and they keep me writing. I really do read each one.