Once Upon a Freezer

So, who does a blog post on a freezer? me
And who actually has a story behind their freezer? me
And who gets teary eyed when the freezer is taken away by a friend to its new home and has to be consoled by her 10 year old? me

The story begins over 13 years ago.  
Anyone who has read my blog over the last few years knows that we lost a full term baby boy back in March of 2000.  The story of Taylor is written in a previous blog post, so I won't go into that too much now.  But after having a stillborn son, our friends, family and church really rose to help.  One way was providing food and meals for our family of 6 at that time.  We received so many meals that we had no place to put all the food and our appetites weren't that great at the moment anyway.  My darling husband went with a family member over to Home Depot and quickly bought us a deep freezer.  It was rapidly filled.  That freezer lasted us well for 13 years and subsequently was filled with meals and treats through 6 pregnancies, a few miscarriages and the death of my father.  It was a great freezer, very well loved but I must admit not taken care of very well.  I think we only defrosted it and totally cleaned it out twice and that was due to a move and a hurricane.  Anyway, as you can tell from the picture below, it looks pretty bad.  But it still worked and I have a lovely friend that needed a freezer with her 3 children and we were in the market for a cow; not a live cow, but 1/4 of a local, grass fed, organic, pastured raised cow.  We ordered our cow with a group of friends and since this current freezer could in no way hold the cow plus all the usual things in our freezer, I got a new freezer for my birthday!  It holds almost double and is much easier to organize and retrieve things from.  Yes, this mom of many did not want anything else for my birthday but a new deep freezer.  I know many of you moms would want that too, right?  And the day before we drove out to the country to pick up our cow, we went strawberry picking and picked 30 pounds of berries!  So now my new freezer is full of 100 pounds of beef (just about every cut you can imagine) and strawberries, plus a few other things : )

Now the day before the new freezer was arriving and the old one going to our friends, we had to clean out the old freezer.  You would not believe some of the things we found.  Here is a partial list and I promise that I am not making any of this up.

4 bags of frozen shrimp
3 plastic containers of food that I have no idea what they were.
20 various Popsicles and Italian ices buried in mounds of ice.
1 dead mouse.
2 dead skinned squirrels in Ziploc bags (I had no idea my boys had put these last things in there!)
1 dead raccoon 

Here is a picture of the clean out.....lol

So, some tears were shed by me when the old freezer left.  I guess it was just the memories and remembering the time it was purchased.  God provides just what we need when we need it.  I was consoled by my 10 year old who looked at me and said, "At least it's going to our friends and not the dump!"  (Out of the mouth of babes.)  And even though my friend said it looked like it got run over or something, she is putting it to good use.  I wonder if she has any dead rodents in it yet : )

The new freezer, stuffed with grass fed, healthy beef.  Hopefully, this will last a year.

A Letter To 16 Year Old Me

Dear Becca,

     You're 16 now, but this year will come and go so very quickly.  Enjoy your youth, don't compare yourself to others and stop over critiquing your appearance.  I know you probably hear things like this all the time, but 30 years from now you will know I was right.  
     Don't ever neglect your time with the Lord. He is your best friend and will be the only one who will always be there for you. Always have time alone to pray and read His word everyday. Don't expect others to always be around or even understand.  In fact, expect to be disappointed with people and then celebrate when you are not.  Even your parents, who are so very wonderful, will not always be there and will not always be perfect.  Enjoy them.  Their time on earth and in your life the way you know it now, is limited.  Cherish your siblings.  Work on building those bonds and work on forgiving.  Be thankful and stop trying to move on to the next stage........college, career, marriage, children, etc.  Be content where you are right now and make the most of every opportunity.
     As far as friends, be the friend that you want to have.  Don't let friendships fade.  People will go in and out of your life, but you will know the ones who are life long friends. Don't judge by outward appearances or first impressions.  You will find that your closest friends will not be those that you would pick out of a crowd.  Don't drop the ball.  Keep in touch with them.  Pray for them, be there for them, love them.  And God will bring that special someone into your life at just the right time.  Don't worry, you will KNOW that he is your soul mate.  He will make you smile like no other.  He will be your best friend, but more than that, he will be your better half.  
     Make the most of the time you have right now.....travel, read, give and hug those around you a lot!  They won't be around forever.  Laugh and enjoy life.  Life is so much more than how you look, who you are hanging out with or how much money you have.  Those things fade so very quickly. 
     God is so very faithful. Life is hard sometimes and really sad, difficult things happen.  But God is writing the story, not us, and He will not disappoint.  I'll leave you with these verses:
"Faithful is He Who is calling you to Himself and utterly trustworthy, and He will also do it (fulfill His call by hallowing and keeping you.) 1 Thessalonians 5:24 Amplified Bible

 "Who can discern his lapses and errors? Clear me from hidden and unconscious faults. Keep back Your servant also from presumptuous sins; let them not have dominion over me! Then shall I be blameless, and I shall be innocent and clear of great transgression.  Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable in Your sight, O Lord my firm, impenetrable Rock and my Redeemer."  Psalms 19:12-14 (Amplified Bible)


(A friend asked me to write a letter to her daughter who was turning 16. So in honor of my birthday week, I wrote it to myself : )


      

Night Night.....Getting Kids to Bed Without Too Much Drama

And this is what happens when the bedtime schedule/routine is ignored......falling asleep on my bed with rollar skates on!

I had a mom ask me advice for how to get kids to bed without too many tears and without it taking half the night.  While I'm not an expert on sleep and bedtime, I will let y'all know how we do it and what works for us.  I've mentioned bedtime a little in some other posts, but I don't think I've done a complete post about it, so here goes.

First of all, while I do have my young babies sleep with me some when they are nursing a good bit at night, we are not a co-sleeping family.  Each child and baby has their own bed or crib and I try to get them used to it pretty early.  So, if you are a "family-bed" type person, then this post may not relate to you.  I also don't sleep well with a child in bed with me (unless my husband is out of town or they are really little) so if a child comes in our room in the middle of the night due to sickness or fear, then we have them sleep on the floor by our bed.  I keep extra blankets and pillows in our bedroom for this purpose.  I've woken up in the morning many times with 2-3 children sleeping on the floor around our bed.  The great thing about this is they usually don't like to sleep on the floor too many nights or for too long before they realize their own bed is much more comfortable. 

As far as bedtime routine, we try to keep it just that.....a routine.  We are pretty consistent with the time we start the whole routine as well.  First we give them all a snack, usually after pajamas and baths (we don't do baths for everyone every night.)  Then they go upstairs and brush teeth.  We then read them a book, say prayers with them, sing a song, give hugs and kisses and that's it.  Usually one of us does this with the 4 who need it (ages 5-11.)I'm not counting my teenagers here since they are pretty self-sufficient. The other parent puts the little boys down about a half hour or so earlier.  For the little ones (ages 2-4), we brush teeth, read 1-2 picture books rock and sing, pray and that's it.  The one parent that didn't put the others down, of course has to go check on them and give them a goodnight kiss.  This is a must (at least to them : ) and they will usually not fall to sleep until both parents (of course this is if both parents are home) have kissed them goodnight. 

We do discipline if a child is disobedient and keeps getting out of bed.  I don't move my children out of a crib until 2 1/2 at least.  I think toddlers are driven to get up after being put down to sleep and sometimes just can't control themselves (especially boys.)  I don't discipline them for getting up until I know that they understand completely what they are doing.  Plus, I think for safety sake it's better to keep them in the crib longer.  Unless of course, they are climbing out, which none of my kids have learned to do, thankfully. If child is crying in their bed or crib, we do go in and console or rock them every 15 minutes or so until they go to sleep.  This actually rarely happens with my children though. 

I've mentioned this before but we have "white noise" type fans in most of the bedrooms, especially the younger ones.  I think this kind of lulls them to sleep some and it keeps them from hearing all the "fun" activity going on after they have been put to bed.  I think this is a must if your home is small or you have older kids that stay up much later, even later than the parents!

Now, of course not everything goes perfectly.  We have one child that usually gets up a few times to come "check" on us but she will get in trouble if she does this more than once.  We also have one other girl right now that won't sleep in her own bed alone.  She wants to sleep in a bed with a sibling just about every night.  We worked out a schedule for her at the moment.  She is a real cuddle bunny and also is a little paranoid of bugs.  We're all hoping she out grows this stage soon. 

As far as dealing with fear, we pray with them, say Bible verses, have night lights and usually leave the door open. We have had children over the years that have gone through stages of being more than a little scared.  We have found that Christian story CD's, quiet classical music or even the Bible on CD really has helped.  Putting that on quietly when we leave the room and turn out the big light, really gets their mind off any scary thoughts.  I have 2 boys particularly, that have always fallen asleep to classical music or story tapes. If you are having a child with fear issues, I would make sure they are not watching anything scary or disturbing or even just too much stimulation during the day.  It also helps when you have more than a few children, so each child has someone to share a room with : )

The Science of Sweet Tea and Other Southern Cooking Shenanigans

Yes, I succumbed to my south Louisiana roots and had a live crawfish boil at my house over Easter weekend.  I kind of freaked out my husband's northern relatives : )

But, this is what you do in the south!  You make the most of the one time out of the year that you can get a certain food alive and fresh.  This might be fresh deer meat during deer hunting season, strawberries in the early spring, fresh blueberries right off the bush in the summer and of course live crawfish in late March.

After you boil the crawfish live with cajun spices and seasonings, you dump them on a table peel ( I had to teach everyone how to do this properly.) You are supposed to boil them with corn and potatoes, but I forgot about this at the last minute (big, oops in Louisiana!)

OK, I hope my Louisiana relatives aren't laughing, but we had to cook them on the grill.  I didn't have the big kettle that most cajuns do to do it outside.  But this is a great southern cooking tip.......cooking on the grill!  Really, anything can cook on the grill.

So, now on to the sweet tea and the science of how I make it.  Sweet tea is the drink you never ever make with a powdered mix and you always have on hand if you live in the south.  The following is my recipe that I made up myself.  It's the easy, cheap, healthy way to do it.

To make a regular 2 quart pitcher........
Fill a 2 cup measuring cup with water.
Add 2 large family size Luizianne decaf tea bags (you can use Lipton family size bags if that is all you can find)
Add 2 regular size plain green tea bags (I mostly do this for the antioxidant benefit)
Put in the microwave and zap for 5 minutes.  Then let it sit for 5 minutes.
Put 1/2 cup of sugar in the bottom of your pitcher.  Then pour in the hot tea to melt the sugar. Fill the pitcher the remainder of the way with cool water.  Stir and pour over ice.  Never put ice in the tea pitcher and never add lemon to the tea pitcher either (it will cloud and dilute the tea!)  Add a slice of lemon to each glass. When I make it for my large crew, I use a gallon size pitcher and a 4 cup measuring cup and double the recipe. We go through a gallon a day : )

And the biggest southern cooking tip...........always have pork on hand.  Bacon and ham make anything taste better.  And really, it doesn't have to be too much or too fatty.  We had 14 bean soup tonight for dinner with a little Virginia ham chopped in and it was healthy and yummy!  And every recipe that starts with "first, fry up a little bacon" has to be good : )

My Take on the Difference Between Boys and Girls

#1-Girls stay put for pictures.

#2-Girls smile, and pose, for pictures.  Boys just endure it.

But seriously, here are some differences (besides the obvious ones) that I've noticed over my 22 years of birthing and parenting 6 boys and 4 girls.

#3-boys love weapons and turning everything into a weapon.

#4-Girls love to talk, especially with other girls, boys you almost have to pry every word from, unless they happen to be in the mood.

#5-Girls are easier babies, in general, and easier toddlers, but boys seem to be easier children.  Now when they hit older teenage years, I think it switches again.

#6-Boys get over things easier and don't stew over things as much as girls.  But I think boys are meaner to each other.

#7-Girls have to be checked on at night about 110 times more than boys.  My boys will come into my room and tell me goodnight (so sweet : )

#8-My boys will "make" their own fun whereas my girls like to "do" things and go places more.

#9-My girls are generally more organized, at least at a young age, and like to plan things out.

#10-Girls are cleaner, neater and take orders better.  My boys love to give orders and naturally take to being in charge (some more than others, wink)

Well, please chime in with your thoughts on boys vs. girls.  So glad God made them unique and I tell people that you really need to have at least one of each to understand the fun and diversity.

Grocery Shopping Gone Crazy

So, in the past 2 weeks, I have been to 7 different grocery stores.  Now this is more than usual, mostly because of Easter coming up and just being out many various things that come from various stores.  Now before you think this is crazy or without rhyme and reason, let me explain.  First of all I am blessed to live in an area where there are many different types of grocery stores not too far away.  I hate to waste gas driving far just to save money (just doesn't make sense to me) but if I'm in an area where there is a store I rarely frequent, then I will just run in for a few things.  Each store I visited these past 2 weeks, has it's plus and minuses, which I will explain. I know we are all feeling the pinch when it comes to grocery budgeting.  Prices have risen across the board, and if your family is like mine and your trying to eat healthier, then it really can be "sticker shock." Now, remember, I'm feeding a household of growing children and I like to cook most of our things from scratch. So, here is where I've been shopping lately.......

1. Harris Teeter-for those who don't have a HT near them, this store is similar to a Kroger or Publix.  It's my "go-to" neighborhood grocery store and my favorite.  They do double coupons up to $1 all the time and frequently do triple coupons. They have lots of samples for the kids and we know everyone that works there.  We like going there and seeing all our friends and getting free cookies. They also have small shopping carts for the little ones and race car shopping carts that can hold up to 3 kids! This store has great lighting, a smooth layout, pleasing decorations and is just such a nice shopping experience. Plus, this is where I use my grocery game membership that I've talked about in other grocery shopping posts.  I save a good bit of $ with their deals and using coupons on sale items.  But, without coupons or buying their name brand things, it is pricey, but over all such a nice experience.

2.  Walmart-We have a new Walmart that is just groceries.  It's nearby and great!  The prices can't be beat but they don't ever double coupons.  They have an aisle with many large and bulk size items, just like Sam's.  They also have a good bit of "southern" items that I can't find anywhere else around here.  They have great prices on school supplies and toiletries.  But they have no fresh deli or bakery and no free samples for the kids, or special grocery carts for the little ones.

3.  Aldi's-Many of my large family friends swear by Aldi's to save money. It really is a neat concept with no bags, baggers and shopping carts you put a quarter in to use.  The prices on produce are great and if you are OK with their name brand things, then it is even cheaper than Walmart.  They do have some "name brand" things, but they are not any cheaper than other stores.  I'm a little skeptical of their brand but so far what I've gotten there hasn't been bad.  It's not that close to my house so I don't go very much.  To be perfectly honest, I'm not crazy about the atmosphere, but it is cheap.

4.  Fresh Market- The ultimate grocery store, my family thinks.  This store is purely ambiance and decorating.  It's so nice to visit when you're having a bad day : )  But don't ever do a big shopping there or you will probably pass out in the cashier line (I almost did once!)  Two great things about this store are on Tuesdays the milk is $2.99 a gallon, their chicken dinners are a great deal all the time ($13 for a rotisserie chicken, 2 sides and cornbread) and their meat counter is awesome for special occasions.  Oh, and my teenagers absolutely love their pies.

5.  Whole Foods-I love this store.  It cheers me up, but one of my friends calls it "Whole Pay Check."  It is pricey and you have to know how to shop there to get good deals.  My local WF does a "saving money" workshop every few months.  I went to that once and it did help me. Basically, buy the bulk things and they also have bulk prices for everything.  I buy 4 milks when I go, for example, to get the bulk price.  They have things other stores just don't, like large bags of Swiss water decaf coffee beans.  They have a great deli, salad bar, bakery, cheese counter, etc.  Not to mention awesome produce and lots of free samples.  Also, I love being able to shop there and know that nothing there GMO, has high fructose corn syrup, or hydrogenated oils.  

6. Trader Joe's-There are some things you can only get at TJ's for the low price they offer.  They have great organic produce prices, if you don't mind all the packaging.  Most of the store is prepared goods from far away and really geared more to singles or small families.  I do love their sprouted bread (which is healthier due to being low carb and high protein), their soaps, nuts and random other things.  There flowers are a great price too.  I don't go here often, and if you've never been to one, it's a little hard to explain.  It's similar to Aldi's (actually owned by the same German company now) in that it's almost all their own brand name.  My kids don't think there food is very good.  I guess they are spoiled : )

7. Target- My neighborhood Target does have groceries, but I rarely go there for food items.  They have good coupons and good sales, but I find that I spend money on toys, clothes, jewelery, home goods, etc, that I just don't need.  So, I like to limit how much I go to Target because I like it so much.  But it is nice to grab some groceries that you may desperately need if you are in there already. 

This picture was taken this summer at BJ's. I've found that with the gas I spend to get there, the membership cost, the fact that they are picky about using coupons (except their own) that I don't really save money and probably buy things we don't need.  I've let my Sam's and BJ's memberships expire and I'm not missing them at all.

I just love the free kid wagon at Whole Foods.  Each kid can pick out one thing from the wagon to eat : )

When Dad's Away, The Mice Will Play......Handling Life With a Traveling Husband

My husband has had to travel a few times a month since he started working in the hotel business 17 years ago.  I have to admit, I didn't use to handle it near as good as I do now (not that I really handle it very well now either : ) But  God has given me grace and it is easier with older ones in the house to help.  My husband has had to travel a bit more lately and I also have a good many friends whose husbands have had to travel for work a lot lately as well.  This got me thinking about some things that have helped me and my marriage through days and nights of a traveling husband.  I do think that traveling can really wreck havoc on a marriage and is something the enemy uses to destroy godly marriages.  It's only by the grace of God and having Him as the center of a marriage that any of us can stay married in this day and age.  We also should pray for good solid jobs for our husbands that do not require too much travel, as well as making our homes such that our husbands don't want to travel ;)
Anyway, here are some things that have helped us through the years when it comes work related travel:

1.   Always try, as much as possible, to have your husband leave on a good note.  Try to mend any quarrels and certainly don't start an argument right before he leaves.  Have him leave with a smile on your face and a good long hug and kiss.

2.  Leave him notes in his bag or suitcase.  This helps connect him to you and home.  My husband is so good about leaving the kids and me notes around the house before he leaves too. 

3.  I rotate kids sleeping in the bed with me when he is gone.  It's something for them to look forward to and I have a running list of whose turn it is to sleep with mom.  They all have done this until they were about 14, at which point they out grow it : (

4.  Many times we make the evening kind of special when my husband is away (not that we are celebrating or anything, it just helps the evening not seem so sad and lonely.)  We will make cookies, maybe even watch a movie and some times pick-up takeout for dinner. 

5.  My husband and I make sure that we talk on the phone at least once a day when he is out of town. This is usually in the evening just before bed.  I think this is really good for both of us.  We also text each other more than usual during the day.

6.  We plan a date night for the weekend after he has been gone.  I know this is sometimes hard when he's been away from the kids too during the week.  But really, your marriage is the most important thing and the kids need to see Mom and Dad wanting to spend time alone together.  This makes them feel secure and know that they are in a home with a loving, healthy marriage.

7.  Make sure you know in advance when your husband will have to be gone.  This has helped me prepare my weeks and just mentally prepare.  My husband is usually pretty good about letting me know and sometimes I'm not too good at writing it down.  I'm trying to get better.

Well, this is all I could think of at the moment. But please, if you moms have any other tips, chime in!!!