Friday, July 26, 2013

Children's Book Analogy.....What Stage Are You In?

This past week I met with some friends that I "do" life with.  We've been together for over 10 years now, have helped raise and loved each other's kids and been there for each other through the good, bad and the ugly.  We all have some grown children now, some married and even one of them became a grandmother this week!  We talked about how hard it is to let go and push our precious ones out of the nest.  To let them test their wings and fly. To trust God with them. Then I ran across an old post by my mentor/friend who went to be with the Lord this past year, Barbara Curtis.  She talked about the stage of life when we have adult children and mentioned these books and it got me thinking..........

Oh, what a precious book above.  Have you read it to your children?  Most moms in the US have read it many many times, frequently with tears in their eyes.  For those who have never read the book or have forgotten the story, it is about a mother rabbit who will go anywhere and become anything for her little bunny who wants to run away from her.  This bunny wants to be independent and free, but is still very small and in the end he realizes he needs his mama.  The story ends sweetly with them hugging, kissing, etc.  But, in some ways this book is a bit "creepy", at least that is what my teenagers and college students would say. The mother doesn't want to let go and doesn't want the baby out of her sight.  This is all well and good but at some point, she will have to let go.  I am in that stage now, at least with some of my children, ........so now I must let go and relate to this book........


So, has everyone read this book too?  Most of you moms probably even had this book read to you by your own mother  : ) 
The dog keeps going and going and has a friend that keeps popping into his life saying "hello, good-bye, do you like my hat, etc."  and then leaving again.  He never knows when the "friend" will show up and has to keep saying hello and good-bye and maybe throw in some advice, comments, etc.  This is my life now.  I need to let go.  I need to get use to those older ones coming and going and many times asking my opinion, being my friend, maybe even being my little child for a moment or two, and then they run off again to their next big adventure.  And this is OK.  I need to accept it and not be a "creepy mom" who can't let go. 
So, in the midst of cleaning out my kitchen desk drawer this week (yes, I'm still organizing) I found a typed paper my father had written called "What It Means To Let Go."  I was shocked to see the header!  He must of typed it up to use in a Sunday School parenting class he taught many years ago (he died in 2006.)  Here are some of the points he wrote:

To "let go" doesn't mean to stop caring, it means I can't do it for someone else.

To "let go" is not to cut myself out of their lives, but realize that I can't control another.

To "let go" is to not try to fix, but be supportive.

To "let go" is not to deny, but to accept.

To "let go" is not to enable but to allow learning from natural consequences.

To "let go" is not to regret the past, but to grow and live for the future.

To "let go" is to fear less and love more.

Good job Dad!  

1 comment:

  1. very well said...thanks for sharing Becca.

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Thanks so much for your comments! I love them and they keep me writing. I really do read each one.